Monday 14 December 2015

I'll Come Out of Hiding...

...to tell you about how my boobs are in hiding!

I finally went through and moderated all the comments from over a year of not having the mental space for this blog. I laughed, I cried, I deleted robot sex spam. You guys are the best. I only went in to moderate the comments because I felt terrible that you spent time writing comments that weren't published, but along the way, I realized I can't stand the idea of not giving you all an update!

My boob-ambivalence is alive and well, but I've found a powerful ally in my quest for flowy crop tops. It happens to be one of the least beautiful bras ever made, and I'm beyond addicted to it. It's the one, the only, the Fantasie Esme. (See my old review here.)

The main problem with the Esme is that it was discontinued approximately six seconds after I discovered it. One week I bought two of them on eBay in a 32H for $20 a pop, and the next week when I went to buy 800 more of them, they had been scrubbed from the face of the internet.

Since then I've obsessively bought them in every sister size and altered the bands (the sizes below G only have two hooks and a slightly different shape, so buyer beware if you want to do this).

Just as a refresher course, this is what my boobs look like in a run-of-the-mill balconette and tight top:


Here's what my boobs like look in a Fantasie Esme and a flowy top.



WHERE DID THEY GO?

They're in hiding, but I'm back... and I'm back to tell you ladies about how you, too, can take your big boobs undercover--if that's something you're into.

24 comments:

  1. I'm so excited to see you back! And I'm excited to hear about this undercover project :) :) :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nice to see this pop up on my RSS feed again. Your posts were always well worth reading. I think I still prefer purple to hiding but glad you're finding what works for you.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Happy to see you back! I only recently found your blog and it has helped me a lot with my large full-on-top bust. My first online shopping spree of bras resulted full-cup bras, and y'all know what it looked like... But thanks to this blog I'm a lot wiser now and targeting some Cleos and a Freya!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm so happy to see you're back. I missed your posts - the full-bust blogsphere is not quite the same without you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Welcome back! I hope you're well. :) I was so happy to see this post, I had really missed your reviews. This blog saved my life, I didn't know anything about bras before and was always self-conscious. Reading through your posts really helped me find the brands and styles that suit me, and I'm a changed woman! So thank you, and may you find more Esmes in your size. <3

    ReplyDelete
  6. Yay, you're back! I agree with AE3nn: your posts are always worth reading. (I do disagree about using regular laundry detergent on bras, but that's something I can live with.) You look fabulous in that light coral flowy top, wearing the Fantasie Esme underneath! Looking forward to another analytical, problem-solving article from you!

    ReplyDelete
  7. So glad to see you back! And I love the before/after.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Thrilled to see you back! It's been lonely here in full-on-top land. And how odd to see you pop up just days after I quoted your farewell comments on Freya bikinis as a "shining shield of good feelings"!
    http://comfycurvy.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hi! I have been reading your blog since I started working for an online bra company. I was very sad that you were no longer blogging, and have literally read every post. I learned a lot from you in the beginning. I happened to come back to reread your Freya Marvel review (since I've been pining for it) and saw your new post! You're a fantastic writer.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'm so glad you're back!!! I missed your no-nonsense style!

    ReplyDelete
  11. That's fantastic that you're back! From, a longtime fan.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Welcome back....Hope you will stay with us

    ReplyDelete
  13. Hiiii!! I've been in tears and depressed over bras for the past 7 years! I've had 4 children and with each child my boobs have grown but I've remained full on top. I haven't even had a wardrobe in 4 years because what's the point? I'm either suffocating to death by my bra or my bra makes wearing clothes ridiculous! I'm now a stay-at-home, homeschooling mom and I'm beyond ecstatic to have literally stumbled on your blog in one final attempt to find a sleep/house bra!! I figured, if I become a recluse I won't need pretty good bras - all I need is a good house bra. :( Even that desperate search hasn't gone well. You, my dear, have given me massive loads of hope! I will be trying all the Panache ones you've mentioned and seeing what you have to say about sleeping in bra. I can't wait! FYI - I'm a 30J/K (US/Euro) and a 30GG/H (UK). Please don't stop blogging your findings, frustrations, and such! You really are making a difference! When I get some time, I do intend to teach myself bra-making and try to right the numerous wrongs! I share the same sentiments you had in your post "Holiday Wishlist!" Huuuh...We're gonna get this! We're gonna do this! Stay encouraged! From, a new fan.

    ReplyDelete
  14. So, so glad you're back! You are needed!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Welcome back! :) I was also sad when Esme was discontinued but Echo Lace is a similar bra from Fantasie - unfortunately, it has been discontinued, too, after just a few seasons. But maybe you can still find and try it somewhere!

    ReplyDelete
  16. OMG! I'm so glad you're back. I only recently discovered you, and I think we're boob twins. I'm a little rounder than you, so I have to go up a band from your recs, but I've had really good luck buying bras you loved. So, thank you for sharing and making petite, close-set, full on top a life that's actually possible.

    ReplyDelete
  17. I hope life is making you very happy!

    ReplyDelete
  18. I stumbled upon this blog a few weeks ago. I know you don't post like you used to, but I'm hoping you see this because I want to thank you for having this blog. I have a similar breast shape as you do, and as a 32gg, I'm close in size as well. I always thought I was kind of a freak because certain bras in my size just looked ridiculous on me, with major pointiness or quad boob. I also thought I was saggy because my nipples weren't perky and pointing up. Thanks to your blog, and your commenters, I realize that I'm just full on top, and it's just another normal shape. I just got my first Panache Envy, based on your review, and it's one of the best bras I've ever had. Now that I know what to look for, I'll be saving myself a lot of hassle and money. Thank you for helping me!

    ReplyDelete
  19. I thought of you when the Cleo F/W 2015 collection came out - the new Cleo Hettie has the bottom shape of Cleo Sasha and Alexa and a stretch lace top section. My first reaction was "Bras I Hate would love this one!".

    ReplyDelete
  20. Thank GOD! Your blog changed my life: I have full on top mega boobs and the bras you recommend have been total life savers. The sienna in particular is my favourite bra ever. I only have two - I can't find any more in my giant size - and I dread the day they give out. Off to Google the Esme...

    ReplyDelete
  21. Hi

    I totally agree with your post. I wore Esme all the time although being honest, I felt it looked a bit frumpy. I tried on what felt like hundreds of bra's, but they either didn't fit or made me look so uplifted from the side, my profile looked ridulous! My boobs went from 34FF to 32H after having my son which was very depressing as I suddenly when from DD-G market with plenty of choice to more limited choice and massive straps and 3 hook bras! I personally find massive straps more painful and find if the band is right, the straps don't have to be huge. After altering Gossard Glossies from 36G to 32H, which are great for minimising your shape and look good too, I then found 'the one' bra!

    http://www.marksandspencer.com/youthful-lift-floral-lace-non-padded-full-cup-bra-dd-h/p/p22426556?prevPage=plp

    This bra gives a really natural shape and great support. However, M&S bands are tighter so I find a 34GG is the perfect fit.

    Hope this helps with your search!

    ReplyDelete
  22. Hi

    I used to wear Esme in 32H all the time! I loved the minimised shape although I felt the actual bra looked a bit frumpy. Before having my son, I was 34FF so could fit into DD to G ranges with no problem. Despite getting back to my normal weight - my boobs remained 3 cup sizes bigger! It was a struggle to find decent bras, that didn't have huge straps and resembled boulders! I did try to alter bra's - Gossard Glossies in 36G converted to 32H were really great, minimised shape, normal straps and great support.

    However, I did find 'the one' bra last year! Link below

    http://www.marksandspencer.com/youthful-lift-floral-lace-non-padded-full-cup-bra-dd-h/p/p22426556?prevPage=plp

    In M&S, I wear 34 band (it fits as tight as 32 in Panache and Freya) so 34GG is equal to 32H.

    Hope this may help on your search!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I struggle to find a bra with a low gore in a GG or H - thanks for sharing this! I'll have to try this the next time In the UK.

      Delete